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Forgiveness, Healing, and Wellness
by Laura Silva Quesada
Every New Year brings with it the hope for a new start and practicing
forgiveness may be the action to take for acquiring that fresh start this year.
Forgiveness is the ability to allow, and deal with error, and weakness in
yourself and others. It is a way to give up resentment, and work through
offenses resourcefully. Forgiveness has the power to heal every part of your
being; spirit, mind, body, and emotions. Through the healing energy of
forgiveness, your spirit finds compassion, your mind thinks more positively,
your body can heal faster, and your emotions are free to experience joy.
Forgiveness has the potential of soothing uncomfortable feelings between
people, reuniting broken relationships, creating new relationships and giving
you the necessary strength to move forward in a healthy manner. Forgiveness can
be experienced as warm, releasing, and very empowering, and something that
comes out of your own free will. No one can force you to forgive anyone, not
even yourself, and the energy involved in forgiving is the same energy involved
in being forgiven. We often want forgiveness, yet refuse to forgive others. If
we cannot forgive others, then we cannot expect others to forgive us.
Not forgiving is costly, and painful. Not forgiving feeds negative energies
that lead to grudges, hatred, revenge, and illness. It allows the hooks of
those past actions to stay hooked deep within us, holding us back from living
fully, and completely. You have nothing to lose, and everything to gain by
forgiving.
Forgiving offenses can be difficult to do, yet, we must for our own wellbeing.
Offenses are negative, and any negative experience, or memory has the potential
of weakening the immune system in much the same way as does chronic stress, and
more so if the experience was traumatic.
On a more personal level, when we offend, we experience guilt. Guilt is often
experienced when you have done something you "should" not have done, or did not
do something you "should" have done, and now you are suffering, or someone else
is suffering because of that. The presence of guilt can break anyone's spirit,
mind and body through time, and cause high levels of stress. The best cure for
guilt is forgiveness.
Holding on to resentment due to someone else's offenses can also lead to
similar negative effects on the body. The automatic release of unnecessary
chemistry into your system every time you think of the offense can have a
damaging effect on your health through time. Let go of the anger, and
resentment. Remember, it is the forgiver that is freed in forgiving.
Considerations for forgiving others:
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Find the strength to rise above negative energies like anger, fear, resentment,
hatred, vengeance, finger-pointing, suspicion, bitterness, and condemnation.
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Remind yourself not to get caught up in the negativity, and do not get even
with the offender. Do not stoop to that level.
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Consider the offenders perspective, and realize that people are doing the best
they know how according to the resources, tools, and wisdom they have. You may
have reacted the same way in a similar circumstance.
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Accept the fact that the action is past, and that chapter of your life is
closed. For the sake of your future you must let go of the past, become wiser,
and move forward. Forgiveness is necessary if you ever plan to live fully and
happily again.
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Separate the offense from the offender, and in your heart, and soul, release
the offender, let him/her go. It is recommended that you do this part while in
a meditative state.
While meditating, do the following:
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Imagine the offender standing in front of you.
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Tell the offender how the offense affected you, and the pain it has caused.
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Tell the offender that you understand he/she was doing the best they knew how,
and that you are now ready to release it to the past where it belongs.
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Imagine severing an imaginary connection between you, and the offender, or
removing the imaginary hooks from deep within you, and as you do, say "I
forgive you."
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Imagine the offender floating quickly away, like a balloon floating high into
the sky until it completely disappears.
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Forgiveness does not mean you condone, or are forgetting what has happened. In
fact, you don't even have to like the person you are forgiving, and you don't
need to reconcile, nor do you need to reestablish a relationship with them if
it is not in your best interest.
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Considerations for forgiving self:
There may be a need to forgive yourself. Having done something you "should not"
have done, or not having done something you "should have" done can be a source
of tremendous stress. Through time it can weaken your immune system, and lead
you to illness.
While meditating, do the following:
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Imagine standing in front of yourself, or the person(s) who you have offended.
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Tell them that you feel deep repentance for your past action(s) (Specify the
offense), and that you understand how they have suffered because of what you
did. Tell them that you will never behave in that way ever again. Let them know
that you were doing the best you knew how under those circumstances, and that
you have learned, and grown from that experience.
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Let the person(s) know that you are deeply sorry for the hurt you have caused
him/her. Mentally say to them "I am sorry for ___________, and ask them for
forgiveness. Let them know that you will make it up to them if you can.
Mentally say this in a genuine, heartfelt manner.
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Imagine severing an imaginary connection between you, and person(s) you have
offended, or removing the imaginary hooks from deep within you, and as you do,
hear that person(s) say "I forgive you." Feel deep inside you the burdening
weight lifting, the hooks released, and you being freed. Feel, and express your
gratitude.
By just reading this, you have taken the first step. Let these thoughts find a
place inside you. Let them settle, and strengthen. When the time is right,
don't be surprised if the act of forgiving happens all by itself, and in a most
natural way. Be open to the possibility of reconciling with the offender, or
those you have offended, and be strong even if, and when you realize that not
everybody is as ready as you are to forgive. Nevertheless, do it anyway. Do it
for yourself. You deserve it.
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There is nothing you can do about changing the past physically. You can change
it, although, mentally, spiritually, and emotionally. Make the decision to let
the past go, and to release the negativity that is attached to it.
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 Foundation for Positive Change
by Laura Silva Quesada
Learn the best available method for meditating and use it to your full advantage. Reach your personal goals with our recommended step-by-step Three Deep Breath Method for entering your meditation.
Available in your preferred format:
eBook | MP3 audio download | Audio CD
Positive Thoughts/Positive Outcomes | eBook
by Laura Silva Quesada
Will help you to understand that thoughts influence subjective, spiritual energy that affect emotions, health, manifestation, and/or outcomes. To understand that subjective energy is a cohesive, attractive energy that responds to thought and to which matter conforms.
Faith and Manifestations | article
You must have faith in order to manifest any outcome. A clear understanding of
faith will help insure your success in manifesting your goals, dreams and the
life of your own design.
Trigger Mechanisms and Internal States | article
A trigger mechanism can be a specific experience of any of the physical senses
that releases or activates a conditioned or predictable response. It could be
an image, sound, sensation, smell, or taste.
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